Message to Michael from His Mom...

Someone once said that when a child dies, parents grieve harder and longer than with any other loss.  I believe this to be true for I miss you terribly son.  My pain and sorrow is as intense now as it was on 2 November 2005...always there just below the surface.  Having a child die before his parents just seems to go against nature.  It isn't supposed to happen that way. 
 
I believe a child is a gift from God for his parents to take care of, to love above all things, and not take for granted.  As parents, your father and I hope we did what we needed to do to raise you, Bobby, and Lauri to be kind and decent adults....to understand the important things in life...family, friends and also to have strong moral and religious values.  I think we've accomplished that. I thank God for we have been very blessed with extraordinary children and grandchildren.
 
Michael, in my eyes you are still my little boy, because a son, no matter his age, in the eyes of his mother, will always be her little boy.  You are a part of me yet separate and independent from me with a mind of your own, but nevertheless a piece of me. With your death, a significant piece of me is gone and can never be replaced.  Your death was the death of an unfulfilled life and a significant part of my own life thus a part of me died too.
 
With your loss, your father and I have also suffered the loss of the hopes, dreams, and expectations we had for you...the promise of things to come.  We always wanted you to find a loving wife and have children of your own so you would know the incredible joy of being a parent that we have experienced.  As our child, you represented our sense of ongoing life.  It is a deep and painful hurt that goes beyond any words of description.  Only someone who has lost a child can truly understand this.
 
Actually, I think the older a child is the more painful his death is to his family.  As your parent, I looked at you and saw in you an image of your father and I. You were some one we could talk to, share opinions with and do things together with. Now all the potentials you showed us as you grew and matured are gone. Gone are all the things we as a family could have done together. Gone are the things you could have done, and the achievements you could have made for us but most of all for yourself.   Why did God have to take you from us?  You were such an incredible and unique person with a smile that could light up a room.

Words cannot adequately or sufficiently describe the meaning and value of your short life. You found your own direction, focused on your dream, and accomplished more meaningful things in your short life than most.   The family continues to get correspondence from friends and other people whose lives you've touched.  How lucky you were to have been so loved and respected.  Maybe God took you because you already touched more hearts than most of us could touch in a lifetime.
 
My son, you have gone home now, but your family's memories of you will forever remain vivid in our minds and forever warm our hearts.  We are all extremely proud of you and what you accomplished in your short life.  The pain we have experienced in losing you was worth every moment to have the honor of having you as our son/brother.  We pray that we will join you in Heaven some day as we are sure that is where you are.  Without that faith, I know I could not face another day.
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